Supporting Hard Conversations

2020 hasn’t been an easy year. Actually, to state that 2020 hasn’t been an easy year feels like a gross understatement. It has challenged us in every way imaginable. The first part of the year greeted us with a global pandemic that brought the world to a screeching halt and then the civil unrest catapulted by the senseless killing of George Floyd brought us to our knees. It’s hard to think about coming together when there’s so much tearing us apart.In all of this, you can bet that your community members are struggling. Whether they are openly admitting to it or not, they are seeking outlets and safe spaces to allow them to make sense of what is happening in our world. As a community manager you have a responsibility to facilitate these hard conversations if your community needs it. It isn’t easy and there’s the balance between holding space for community members to talk and continuing to move the goals and purpose of the community forward. It certainly doesn’t have to be one or the other, but it’s tricky to navigate.Here are a few things to consider as you think about what you can do to support your community members when they need a space to have hard conversations:Hold Space and Be AvailableTough conversations in an online community can be seen as distracting (unless, of course, that is what your online community was created for). They can also be cathartic to your community members so they feel like they aren’t alone. I believe it’s important to allow for pause and hold space for people to speak to how they are feeling, and you can do this while still keeping the focus on the purpose of your community. Proactively open a thread and allow the conversation to happen there. Then, be available to ask questions or facilitate the conversation so that it remains respectful and so that you can answer any questions that may come up about your association and any actions it may be taking (i.e., what is XYZ Association doing to help?). This may mean that you’re on much more than you normally are, but communities don’t shut down at the end of your workday. You should expect to support your community members when needed. That doesn’t mean you need to stay up all night but monitoring what’s going on long past when you’ve logged out for the day should be expected to ensure that your community feels taken care of. When it seems like the steam has run out of the conversation, you can make the decision to close the thread with an offer for anyone to reach out if they need to talk further.Keep an Eye on Your CommunityThis not only speaks to watching what your community members are talking about as they process what’s happening in the world. Some may not be as open as they normally would be. Some may be more vocal than they have ever been before. In many cases, the passion behind how your community members feel can come out in a number of ways. It’s important that you keep an eye on your community to make sure that people are being heard, conversations remain productive (and respectful, as mentioned above), and that there aren’t any bad actors who have suddenly popped up to cause discord among your community members. You may think that the likelihood of that happening is slim, but if your community is open to others (not gated by membership), this is no different than spammers creating accounts to sell watches or give away sneakers. The goal is not to police your community, but to protect them and the space they hold as sacred and safe. You’re also protecting your association from any false information that could be associated with that activity.Reach OutThis, I feel, is always necessary. In uncertain and trying times, it is very easy to completely shut down and try to shrink away from the world and all that is happening in it. The people in your community are human and they have feelings and process them in a myriad of ways. If you have active community members or ambassadors that normally, even in the midst of their busy day, find time to engage and they have disappeared, reach out to them. Send them an e-mail, a chat, or pick up the phone and call them to ask how they are doing. Many of your community members may not be okay, but I can guarantee they would appreciate outreach to check on them even if they don’t want to talk.There really isn’t an easy way to navigate how to allow for hard conversations in your community. But I think it’s needed. If you’re not sure how to approach it, have a conversation with a colleague or your manager/director to understand how to best support your community and allow your them space to talk in a time of unrest.We will get through this, but only together.If you need someone to talk to, please pop into the Community by Association Network or reach out to me directly. If you have additional tips to share, please add them to the comments below.